What you say, and how you say it, will inform other people about how you think.
But, here’s what a lot of people don’t know…it informs the way you think, too.
So, if you want to make change happen in your life, then come to your senses for help!
If you’re a regular reader of my blog, it won’t come as any surprise to you that our thinking consists of images, sounds, feelings and, to a lesser extent, tastes and smells.
Quite literally, the entirety of our experiences have been recreated using all five of our senses.
We picture ourselves lying on an idyllic beach, hear the laughter coming from kids splashing in the sea, feel the warmth of the sun as it beats down, taste the sand in the soggy sandwiches we brought for lunch and smell the surf as it rides in on a breeze.
Of course, you may not recall these in equal measure, as we tend to have a bias to one or two of these representations depending on the situation. This may help to explain why two people having the exact same experience will remember it very differently.
Curiously, our predominant representation in a given context will often show up in the language we use.
For example, when responding to the statement “I think the project is going well“, you may say:
- “It’s looking good“, or
- “I’ve been hearing good things about it“, or
- “I feel good about the whole thing“, or
- “Smells like a winner to me!“, or
- “I can almost taste success“
It’s no wonder smells and tastes are less commonly used considering how hard they are to work into the conversation!
These qualities or attributes are called submodalities. These fine-tune the way you represent your experience and can be used to create powerful changes.
The interesting thing to note here is that once you understand that YOU create your internal world, you realise YOU can make change happen.
Have a go at this simple exercise to illustrate how you’re able to create and recreate the way you recall experience:
Think of someone you really enjoy being with and place them in your mind’s eye. Once you have done this, notice the submodalities.
For example, is it a bright or dim picture, where is it located, what sounds do you hear, what sensations do you have, etc.
Once you’ve done this, open your eyes and clear your mind by stretching and looking around the room.
Then, close your eyes and this time bring to mind someone you don’t enjoy being with. Notice the submodalities of this picture. I’m certain that you will have identified several submodalities that are different.
Once you have done this, break state again by stretching and looking around the room.
Generally, we tend to have similar submodalities for the internal representations of people we enjoy being with. The submodalities we have for people we don’t enjoy being with will also be similar and in some way different from those of people we enjoy being with.
This sameness and difference allow us to code our experiences and give meaning to our past and future memories.
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Submodalities are fun and easy to play with.
For example, if the internal representation of someone you do not enjoy being with is large, and up close (i.e. ‘in your face’), what do you think would happen if you made the picture smaller and pushed it away to a comfortable distance? I suspect you would not necessarily end up liking this person. However, you may find them not so overbearing.
Have a go and let me know what happens.
If you need help with this technique, or simply want to share your success in using it, then drop me a line and we can arrange an introductory call.